Thursday's "lesser of two evils" run

I woke up in a strange, unpleasant mood, as if I was waking in someone else's body, with a whole other load of someone else's pain and anger on my mind. It was 6:15. I checked weather conditions. Temps dropping and little wavy lines which must mean wind (to the exclusion of all other weather phenomena). Possible rain around mid day. Checked Facebook for signs of the apocalypse...yep, all of us are headed straight to hell apparently. Sooner than we thought because the evil corporations have won the war because they have all the money and they now officially control our most personal decisions. Why even get up? Oh wait...a documentary about Mister Rogers? Oh, his sister's name was Elaine? Oh, he was named after his grandfather, Fred McFeely? And his mom knitted his cardigans, one a month for everyone in the family? Now I'm tearing up and ready to place my faith in humanity again, because a whole generation of us clung to his gentle words in our tenderest years, like he was sent to each of us like an angel heralding love and acceptance.

I swore off early morning runs about a month ago. But in a back-and-forth fit, should I do it now or later, now, later...I pushed forth and decided Now.

Later.

No, Now.

From bed to Main St. in a little over 15 minutes.

Now I could see why "wind" was the single, primary assessment of the weather at the moment. Temps are irrelevant when you're being blasted in the face with icy gusts. And somehow, pushing northward against the wind, a force from within me directed me to go further than on previous morning runs. I could've gone west. Should have. But something about these weekday runs under dark clouds...I've always headed in the direction of my high school, north. I followed the campus and made the turnaround. By this time feeling empty. Usually the halfway point is my second wind. Not surprising though, with no water or calories. Joints aching. Stomach unsettled. Mental exhaustion. I found myself hopping cautiously over uneven sidewalks, feeling tightness in my hip, thinking about where I was slacking-likely my feet-feeling annoyed at not being able to cross at the light without breaking my stride. All these mundane thoughts weighing me down like lead.

Anyway, it's done. I shall enjoy a quiet lunch break, free from rain or wavy lines or plummeting temperatures. Maybe I'll watch some of those Mister Rogers clips.